Do you find that when you’re on a roll and things are going really well, all of a sudden and quite literally from nowhere things start to go quite dramatically wrong? Do you then feel like you’re right back where you started?
It’s disheartening isn’t it? I’ve been there many, many times. Things are going great, lots of new stuff is showing up – all evidence that I’m on the right track, right?!
And then out of nowhere something goes wrong. A work opportunity disappears. Fun plans get cancelled. Someone behaves unexpectedly. Things break or go wrong.
We put our heads in our hands and ask: “What on Earth am I doing wrong?”
It makes us stop in our tracks and we want to give up.
It’s disappointing, it’s de-motivating and it’s exhausting.
And the more we keep playing out this pattern (moving forward – stopping – going back in our old comfort zone), the more exhausted we become.
When things go ‘wrong’ it feels like a sign from the universe that we are on the wrong track and we should turn back, doesn’t it?
I used to think so too!
But it is actually a sign to keep going.
Counter intuitive, right? But hear me out.
When we are busy taking lots of action to create the changes we want, it feels really exciting as new things show up. The results feel really positive and encourage us to keep going.
Then, as soon as the results don’t feel so positive anymore, we immediately think we’re doing something wrong. This is when so many of us give up. We stop and we head straight back to our comfort zone, which was exactly where we were trying to move out of!
This is perfectly normal, that’s why so many of us do it.
Moving out of our comfort zone isn’t always easy and that’s when resistance shows up. We have a wobble, it feels too difficult. So we stop.
Many of us stop just before we make that transition into our new comfort zone. We turn right back around and head straight back to what’s comfortable and familiar. We know it well after all, even if we didn’t like it there.
So when resistance shows up, it’s actually a sign to keep going and head further away from your old comfort zone and keep taking action to continue moving forward and create your new comfort zone.
As you move out of your comfort zone, some of the stuff that was in there with you (keeping you comfortable!) will no longer be useful or helpful where you going.
So it will absolutely feel uncomfortable as some of this stuff shows up.
Don’t lose heart. It’s a sign to keep going.
It’s an opportunity to look at what’s showing up and ask yourself, what do I need to approach differently, what can I change, what do I need to fix or eliminate?
It’s an opportunity for you to look at this uncomfortable experience, and check what needs to change to continue moving forward.
The important thing here is to keep going! It’s not easy. I know.
But it’s worth a shot, if the alternative is heading straight back to what you’re trying to move away from isn’t it?
Here are 4 tips to help you push through resistance:
- Accept change can be hard. Moving out of our comfort zone into something relatively unknown isn’t always easy. It requires persistence.
- Keep going, don’t stop. Don’t turn around and head straight back to your old comfort zone.
- Approach things differently. When stuff shows up that doesn’t feel positive, ask yourself what you need to eliminate, change or fix. What can you do differently to keep going?
- Celebrate resistance. When resistance show up it really does mean a transition is coming. If you can get excited when resistance shows up then you have the energy to keep going.
Remember: Start small and build from there.
P.S. Where is resistance showing up for you right now? Change won’t always feel safe, as you have no certainly about where you’re going, so approach it differently and find a solution that works for you. Give it a go, what have you got to lose?
P.P.S. Reply via email – I’d love to hear how you are getting on, or let me know if you’re struggling and need a little inspiration to make a start! firstname.lastname@example.org